sheesh, these faces

"Mom, you make a serious smile and I'll make a funny face because myyy funny faces are wonderful."

Lorelei Jade

♥ This is my Lorelei Jade. ♥

♥Perfect in every single way. ♥

♥ I love all of her funny poses ♥

♥ him

I love this man so much. Words won't express it well enough. I sometimes think my actions fall much to short in showing him. he means the world to me and I cannot fathom what my life would be like without him in it. He is so much of who I am. He makes me 'me'. He makes me feel beautiful. He makes me feel valuable and respected. He makes me feel like I am somebody. he makes me feel safe and secure. He loves me more than I thought anybody could love. I'm such a lucky girl to have him.

sometimes-

i might call my kids Bobbleheads.

and people still ask me why.

alet- i mean, alex

This picture was taken back in October (I told you I'm super good at updating my blog in a timely manner). Lorelei sounded out her Tete (auntie) Alex's name all by herself and wrote it. I was pretty impressed that she thought of it, sounded it out and wrote it so nicely. She's amazing. I didn't even know she knew the letter "x". And my favorite part is her little practice "x" up in the corner. Even now she has trouble with those little stinkers because she can't always figure out how to keep them from looking like t's. :) I love her!!

:)

this picture makes me laugh.

say it's not so, Doc.

The girls love playing doctor. LOVE it. I was going through pictures and came across this one and thought I'd post it. Addison had received a little doctor's kit for her birthday so we spend several days taking turns being the patient. In this particular picture-

Lorelei-"Hello. I can make you feel better because I'm a wonderful doctor. I'm doctor Lorelei Jade Tilley. You should tell me what doesn't feel good and I will make you better."

Me-"Everything hurts. Can you fix it?"

Lorelei (matter of fact like)-"Yes. I can. I'm pretty sure it's your tummy. I'll just take a look."

..... I lay down and expose my stomach...she shoves her toy into my belly button and exclaims, "ohhh no. i just knew it."

Me-"What is it?"

Lorelei-"I just knew that you had lady bugs in there! But don't worry. I think I can get them out by tickling you."

Tired of all the arguing over who would be the doctor, I convinced them to both be doctors who are sick so they can fix one another. I then had to convince Lorelei that doctors do indeed get sick (ten minutes wasted). This is what I got.

There are a lot of things about Lorelei Jade that amaze me. I mean, things that leave me seriously astounded at her little tiny self. Today is no different. One of my favorite things about her is that she really listens. Even when you wouldn't expect her to, or when you hope she isn't... she's always listening.

Sometimes, this is a very tricky thing to work around. For instance, one evening Christopher and I were having a conversation between ourselves while Lorelei was apparently in ear shot. We were discussing 'gender swaying', as my sister and brother in law really wanted to have a girl- and succeeded. Something was said about male sperm not living as long as female sperm, so timing must be key. When trying for a girl, you almost have to make sure all the male sperm will be dead before ovulation occurs, then all that are left are female. Well, Lorelei heard and understood enough to ask more questions. "Mom, why do the boys die? Who wants them to be dead? How come girls live longer? Mom, what are sperms?"

Tonight, however, was a much different experience. She was listening all the same, but the questions I got asked were so wonderful and the discussion even sweeter. On our way home from a day in Fresno I had some music playing while the girls slept. I was borrowing my friends' car and thus had her music. I was pleasantly surprised as I grabbed a random CD and threw it in the player. Jennifer Knapp came on. I hadn't listened to her in years and years (yes, unfortunately, I am old enough to use phraseology that includes a double stated 'years') but always loved this particular album. Song after song played. Track 12 began to play and I was immediately reminded of how much I loved the lyrics. The song is called

Faithful to Me

All the chisles I've dulled carving idols of stone
That have crumbled like sand 'neath the waves.
I've recklessly built all my dreams in the sand just to watch, them all wash away.

Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you'd understand
You're the only one who's faithful to me.

All the pennies I've wasted in my wishing well
I have thrown like stones to the sea.
I have cast my lots, dropped my guard, searched aimlessly for a faith
To be faithful to me.

Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you'd understand
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
You're the only one who's faithful to me.

While I thought Lorelei was sleeping, she was in fact listening. Very carefully listening. She made this clear when she softly spoke, "Mom, this is the most beautiful song. I love when she sings the words about her reaching out her weary hand. It's just so beautiful." I asked her what she thought Jennifer Knapp was singing about and what the word weary meant. Lorelei explained, "The song words are about being tired and knowing God will always help us to be strong and He will show us a way to be brave even if we are a little bit scared because He will always take care of us either way. That's what faith is mom and she is singing about faith."

She asked to listen to this song over and over again. To which I obliged. She then began to ask questions like, "What is a chisel? What is an idol? Why would anyone want to carve one? Is carving idols hard work? I bet that's why she has weary hands." (I had to laugh at that one) "what does it mean when when she says they all wash away? Does she want God to be faithful to her? Does everybody have to search very much to find God to ask Him to be faithful to us too? What is a trial? What does reconcile mean?"

In times like this I am so thankful God helps me explain things to her. I feel like I am never without a great answer that's just perfect for her to understand. Not due to any credibility on my part. He just meets me where I fall short.

Of parenting, thus far, tonight has been one of my favorite Mother/Daughter times. I am so thankful for Lorelei and all the different aspects she brings to my life. I wanted to pull the car over, get her out of her car seat and just hug her. I love her precious little heart. I love how sensitive she is, and how intent she is to understand everything.

Her last comments about the song were precious. As we pulled up to park the car, she asked me, "Do you think Daddy would love this song too? I think he will because I know sometimes he is tired and he always loves us so so much and God loves him so so much too. This song is my favoritest song, and Daddy is my favoritest daddy. I will ask him to put this song on my iPod when he gets to come to California too."

Pumpkin Patch 2010

Because I am horribly at staying up to date on my blogging, here are some pics from last October. I know, you're mad that they're so old. But, when you see how cute they are, you'll quickly get over it. Or not. Whatever.

♥

One of my favorite pictures ever.

bed buddies

This picture brings so much joy to my heart because it sums up Addison's friendship with Bella so well. Sometimes, I wonder if Addison even realizes Bella is our pet, and different than human friends. If she does understand it, I'm pretty sure she would argue that 'different' may as well mean 'better'.

robert elliott

I know favoritism is bad. I get that. However, for some reason, Elliott is my girls' favorite cousin. Well, Lorelei's, at least. I don't know why, but she seems to care about Elliott differently than any other cousin. They are best little friends and play so great together. Lorelei gets so excited every time she gets to see him.

I will never forget the first time Elliott got to come visit us up at Hume Lake for the week. It was summer of 2009. Lorelei was 2, Elliott was 3. Almost every night, without fail, I would hear them awake in the middle of the night. I would go towards the kids' bedroom and hear them chatting away about all sorts of little kid stuff. Quiet conversation in the dark.

I think their bonding started long before that, however. I loved when we went to South Carolina to see Evan (Elliott's dad) graduate from basic training in December of '08. We got to have Elliott fly with us, and it was so much fun. Elliott and Lorelei would talk about the funniest things in their little person voices. I remember thinking how blessed she was to have such a great little cousin she was already so close with.

As Addison has come into the picture and gotten old enough to keep up with Elliott and Lorelei, she, too has much the same relationship with him. I pray that never changes. ♥

little tiny loves

Addison isn't that into babies. I think she's still not quite old enough to care since it wasn't all that long ago that she, too, was a wiggly, vomiting, crying bundle of joy. She was much more interested in her Uncle Loren (Lolen, as she called him for a while).

Kashton is the only baby that has ever had her attention. She just wanted to lay with him and do tummy time. We got her to sort of hold him, and this is what she did. :) So sweet.

Then, in the middle of the night she would even wake up crying for Baby Kashy. As annoying as that was, I couldn't help but think it was precious too. I look forward to the special bond my girls will have with him as they all grow up.

they meet at last

Lorelei finally got to meet Kashton a little over a week ago. She has waiting for this day for a very long time. Before we knew Kashton was a 'he', Lorelei called him Tai Chi, and even now she calls him that. She loves her little cousin so much. She was so thrilled to be big enough to hold him and kiss him. She would talk in a sweet little tiny voice, "Hi Baby Tai Chi. You're my baby cousin."

It's so fun to sit back and watch her love on such a tiny person. She loves him with such a big love. One I have rarely seen from her. It's almost as if she's proud to call Kashton hers. And why wouldn't she be?

bella and kashy

Bella loves babies. Especially this one. Kashy is by far her favorite. Any time she is around babies, she gets as close to them as she can and just snuggles right up to them. If they're in a swing or a car seat, she'll sit right next to them, almost as if she is guarding them. I think she understands that they are small and fragile, needing extra special care and love.